Siblings in the Summer: Keeping Everyone Engaged and Included

Summer break is supposed to be all about freedom and fun—but for families dealing with pediatric cancer, it’s anything but simple. Between treatment schedules, travel limitations, and the physical demands of care, parents often find themselves stretched thin. And while every ounce of attention goes toward the child in treatment, their siblings may quietly feel left out, confused, or even guilty for wanting a “normal” summer.

It’s not easy. But with a little creativity and a lot of heart, you can help all your children feel seen, supported, and engaged during these complicated months.

1. Acknowledge Everyone’s Feelings

Siblings of kids in treatment often experience a mix of emotions—fear, frustration, jealousy, or guilt. They may not speak up, especially if they feel like their problems are “less important.” Create space to talk, without judgment. Let them know it’s okay to feel what they’re feeling.

Even a simple check-in like, “How are you doing with everything?” can open up valuable conversations.

2. Build in One-on-One Time

Finding time for anything extra can feel impossible—but even ten focused minutes alone with a sibling can go a long way. Take a short walk, read together, or plan a quick coffee or ice cream run. The goal isn’t extravagance; it’s presence.

Let siblings know they’re not forgotten.

3. Include Them in Care (When Appropriate)

Many siblings want to help but don’t know how. Giving them small, meaningful roles—like making a get-well card, reading a story, or helping organize medical supplies—can help them feel included and empowered.

This only works if they want to be involved—never force it. But for some kids, feeling helpful is deeply healing.

4. Plan Sibling-Focused Activities

Every once in a while, let siblings take center stage. Plan an activity that’s all about them: a movie night, a museum visit, or just a backyard campout. It reminds them their needs and joys matter too.

You don’t need a big budget—just intention and presence.

5. Be Honest About Limitations

It’s okay to say, “This summer will be different.” Kids are resilient, but they appreciate honesty. Let them help shape new traditions within the boundaries you have.

Reframing expectations helps reduce disappointment—and opens the door to surprise joys.

6. Connect with Other Siblings

Support groups or family-oriented programs for pediatric cancer can help siblings connect with others who get it. Whether in-person or online, peer support helps them feel less alone and more understood.

Ask your hospital or care team about local or virtual sibling programs.

7. Keep a Flexible Routine

While treatment can disrupt plans, a loose structure can give siblings a sense of security. Try setting simple rhythms for meals, rest, or screen time. Predictability—especially in unpredictable situations—can be comforting.

This also gives siblings something to rely on when things get chaotic.

8. Celebrate the Little Things 🎉

Don’t wait for the “perfect moment.” Celebrate progress, bravery, birthdays, or even just a really good day. Invite siblings into those celebrations too. It helps reinforce that joy still belongs to the whole family.

Even spontaneous dance parties or backyard picnics can feel like magic.

9. Check In with Yourself

You’re carrying a lot. It’s okay to be tired. Siblings pick up on stress, so don’t forget to care for your own well-being. When you take a breath, you model resilience—and give your kids permission to care for themselves too.

When in doubt, pause, breathe, and reset. You're doing better than you think.

10. Document the Summer Together

Give each child a small notebook, disposable camera, or journal to capture their summer memories. Not everything has to revolve around cancer—and kids need outlets to remember joy, beauty, and growth.

You might be surprised by what they notice, and what moments stand out.

Summer doesn’t have to be perfect—it just has to be real. By making space for all your children to feel heard, seen, and included, you're building a summer that holds everyone close.

You’re not just managing cancer care—you’re still raising a family, with all its complexity and love.

Visit www.jacieskids.org for more support, resources, or to get involved.